I was at a dinner party this evening and the ladies were talking about their trials and tribulations with their teenage boys.
All agreed that masturbation had become a big issue and that they were fed up with crusty sheets - one admitted that she'd fitted toilet roll holders by the boys' bedsteads but even then she was "... astonished at their output" and had been forced to ask them to at least meet half way and deposit the tissues, that she'd provided for their convenience, in the toilet rather than just leave them strewn about the bedroom floor for her to dispose of.
Well I can honestly say that my mother never had such problems with me as a teenager. However, there was the issue of me having to re-plaster (and re-paint) the wall by my bed when we sold our house !
To be fair my bedroom was in the loft and it was freezing for most of the year and accessible only by a ladder.
12 comments:
Blimey. Masturbation seems to be all the rage in that it is discussed seemingly ad nauseum everywhere. Even Woman's Hour ha d ago earlier in the year and repeated again the other day with Tracy Emin asking Jenni Murray if she wanked? I'm still having problems jettisoning those images. There's shops openly selling sex toys that only a few years ago would be seedy looking joints on a back street somewhere horrid....or SoHo. I suppose your post is indicative of this new openness - I'm surprised 'wanking' still gets the larfs on any BBC3 comedy. I'm sure I'd have been mortified if my mother had installed loo roll holder by the bed - that is a bit bizarre. Don't these spurting yoots have no shame when mum asks them to pick up their papier mache efforts every morning? Kids today eh? C'mon kids - use your socks as God intended or it's boxing gloves locked on at night!
On a serious note, Mrs Ranter was coming home on a train the other afternoon and was irritated by a group of teeny girlies behind her, the noise level was nightmarish but she could not believe the main conversation subject - anal sex - it is now apparently 'normal' AND expected by their many male partners. Some had done it, not all liked it - but would still do it!
I am officially old now!
Really nice!!!!
What if J&S read that?
*tuts*
Probably laugh then go and beat one out to dads porn stash (+:
However TMI
Mr Ranter
It is better to give than to recieve
Strange how many women do enjoy both
I have had a few gfs who were desperate to fuck me with a strapon
*serious*
All they got was a finger of fudge and I didnt enjoy it
Like mowing the lawn or being polite to her mother its the price you pay
@Ranter, I listened in fascination to that Womans Hour too, they often have interesting topics of conversation.
Call me old fashioned but I only ever discussed wanking with my closest schoolmates and only for a year or two at that.
I think it's disgusting that she is picking up their tissues. I'd buy a special set of tongs, and stuff them into their pillow-case until they got the message!
Clean up your mess, boys!
I'm glad I don't go to dinner parties.
On the old anal thingy, I had a girlfriend once who preferred it but it just doesn't float the old boat, did I miss that lecture? What on earth is wrong with dinner, a show, some lingerie and plenty of booze and drugs? Ho hum - none of my business really.
Nice Gravatar, Ranter!
As everybody does it, I welcome the loss of this taboo. I'd expect TV programmes about "improving your technique" soon.
Anal used to be mainly for women wishing to keep their hymens intact, or during their periods.
Old jokes:
"Hurts like buggery" means you're doing it wrong.
"Buggers should be stoned. It helps, that's all I'm saying".
hi Kevin, I can't possibly comment on this subject, being as i am a Laydeee and have never raised anything of the male species, except one neutered dog and two neutered tom cats....sorry I can't be of any help!
Happy New Year to you all in the 'Electro' world,
Di.xxx
Smack bang in the middle
Young boys do worse things, I had a mate who collectedhis bogies on his wall,
I went through a phase of squeezing my teenage blackheads (non aboriginal (+) and keeping them on my mirror to see jut how many I xould collect
Oh and I tried drinking my own urine
But then again girls do similar stuff
Kev if I ever need some plastering work you will be the last person I will think of calling
And your parents kept you in the attic????
No wonder you turned out mental
The attic as well as being a shared bedroom with your brother also doubled up as a store for dried food in case of a nuclear war and what was that large piece of machinery in the middle of the room... a lathe?
The bathroom was downstairs so it was easier to piss out the window wasn't it?
And didn't Grandma catch you at it in the bathroom once?
***Warning. Probably the most disgusting post I've ever published***
^ The Pandora effect compels a reading. Happy New Year, E-K.
Ranter - Wanking is cheap, convenient, you can't get V.D. It's available at any time ... and absolutely free !
Beast - TMI ... and then goes on to explain about ex GFs taking him up the batty ! Tuts. (My boys aren't there yet)
Banned - I've only discussed it with my blog mates.
Ms Smack - The perfect solution.
Dick - I've never really understood that either. But each to their own.
Ed - I'm not sure that an open admission of wanking does much for the furtherance of humanity. I wonder if the Romans went through this period.
Trubes - Hiya ! I didn't expect you to know anything. Happy New Year. xx
Beast - Yeah. The attic. I used to piss out of the window as well.
IB - Yup. Nuclear storage in the loft. Ensure it got cooked properly. Grandma serving me a cuppa mid stroke - oh the indignity ! One of those events that was sooo traumatic it didn't warrant a mention.
MTG - Happy New Year to you too.
Post a Comment